(Part 2) While I was sick and not able to get out of bed, I listened to hours of sermons from a church back in the States. I have known the pastor and his wife there for quite some time now and I am so blessed and thankful for their influence in my life. In one of his sermons, he talked about me and read an excerpt from my blog about when I first came to Thailand. It became such a defining moment for me. Nothing like God using your own words to speak to you… He was reminding me of the vision He once gave me and the wild fire He has placed in my heart. It was like in that moment He was blowing on my dwindled embers and reigniting the reckless fire within... "So, allow me to dream big for a second: I want lost souls to find Him; I want evil-doers to turn from their ways and be warriors for His cause; I want women and children to no longer live in fear, but find restoration in His arms; I want a new wave of hope to sweep across Thailand and all the surrounding nations; I want an undeniable joy to fill the hearts of the broken and hurting; I want us to be a people of love that is a catalyst for undeniable impact!... This may seem like a big dream, but I serve a BIG God who is more than capable! My prayer would be that we are all willing to see His big dreams outside our box and step out in faith to bring them to fullness. And I cannot wait to see this masterpiece unfold!" Sometimes BIG things start off SMALL... We often want to be the ones gathering the harvest, after all, what an exciting time to see the fruits of our labor and know your efforts have not been in vain. However, we forget that without planting the seeds and watering the small sprouts daily, there would never be a harvest to begin with! I have found that much of my work here is about planting the seeds and watering the sprouts and that it can be quite discouraging when you have just finished preparing the soil with the seeds, when a huge wind storm blows through your field and tears all the seeds out... A girl receiving help returns to the bars, a girl making great progress is persuaded into going back to her abusive boyfriend, a girl receives pressure from her family and ends up selling her child to pay off their debt... "Lord, why am I doing this?? Is my little light even being seen in this darkness??" I look at the devastated field with disappointment... but God then directs my attention to the many seeds that survived the storm... I am thankful that He has been reminding me of the work He is doing and that He is not done yet. It has given me great hope and encouragement in being able to see a small part of the harvest. So, let me give you some snapshots of these beautiful moments...
*We have a mom at HOS who used to be in our program, but ran back to the bars. She ended up getting pregnant a second time and asked to come back to HOS. With love, we welcomed her back. She didn't want to keep her baby and even contemplated abortion at one point. After much counseling, she decided to at least go through with adoption. However, through MUCH prayer, love, counseling, and support, the day after her son was born she decided to keep him and raise him herself. It was such a celebratory moment! What makes this story even more powerful was that she had no paperwork (she had no ID card and didn't even know when she was born) so she could not receive government support for her hospital bills. It ended up costing around $1,300 USD, which might not seem like much, but for a poor Thai this is about 6 months of salary... Through much prayer, not only did an organization from the hospital pay her bill, but they helped her get the right paperwork (another $550 USD) so she could have an ID card and so that her son could have the right certificates/documents as well! Praise God!!
The stories of all the things God is doing could be quite extensive, so for the sake of time, I'll leave on this note: My lack of words and sickness has been a blessing in disguise in that I have had to rely so much more on His words and Him moving through me. It has drawn me closer to listening for His Words, given me a deep yearning to be present with Him, and a new desire to move when and where He leads. I am so thankful for the ways He is planting seeds despite my weaknesses and I am looking forward to the harvest... ~Current jam sesh: Jeremy Camp “Reign in me”~
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May 2015
Support:If you would like to financially support me or HOS, you can go online and give:
https://www.egsnetwork.com/gift/gift.php?giftid=535530DBD93C42E OR, you can send a check (with Shannon Halloran on the memo line) to: CORD Ministries International P.O. Box 102 Wheaton, IL 60187-0102 * All Tax deductible gift* Questions: Director of CORD Ministries Michael Ullrich (303)-994-4754 [email protected] Links:Family Connection Foundation:
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